Hard to Bear: Investigating the science and silence of miscarriage

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These words can even change the meanings of entire phrases when used incorrectly. The difference between too much to bear and too much to bare comes down to a simple spelling error, but the meanings of each phrase are entirely different. What is the Difference Between Too Much to Bear and Too Much to Bare? Sheila put up with Damian’s immaturity for as long as she could, but she considered his infidelity too much to bear. From the many physical causes of miscarriage, to the socioeconomic, environmental and behavioural factors impacting women’s experiences of pregnancy loss, Oderberg focuses on an Australian context without neglecting alternative statistics and perspectives.

There is often confusion over the words bear and bare. This confusion arises because, knowing a bear is a large mammal (e.g., a brown bear), writers feel uncomfortable using bear in its other meanings. In fact, the word bear is a very versatile word. Here are common expressions with bear:

If you can never remember whether to write bear with me or bare with me; if you can’t tell the difference between I can’t bear it or I can’t bare it, then you’re not alone.

The chapter “More Than Words” responds to the many messages Oderberg has received from people asking what to say or do when someone they know has a miscarriage. On its own this chapter could limit suffering. The suggestions of what not to say are particularly useful – “oh well, at least you can drink now”, not to mention “try again”.Therefore, too much to bare has an entirely different literal meaning than too much to bear. It would refer to excessive exposure rather than excessive burdens. To bear means to support or carry or endure (physically and figuratively). Who can carry heavy things and endure long stretches of extreme weather without food? Bears. Is it too much to bear or bare? Too much to bear means something one cannot endure because it is excessive. Too much to bare is a common mistake based on the homophones bare and bear. Latest Politics Immigration Indigenous Affairs Economy Education Media Law & Crime Defence Religion Choice is great in theory, but just because services exist doesn’t mean access is equal. And if access isn’t equal, the idea of choice is a fallacy.’

Note: The term to bear fruit uses bear not bare. (This term is often mistakely written as to bare fruit.) I can speak with authority on the subject of being hard up. I have been a provincial actor. If further evidence be required, which I do not think likely, I can add that I have been a “gentleman connected with the press.” I have lived on 15 shilling a week. I have lived a week on 10, owing the other 5; and I have lived for a fortnight on a great-coat. Writers are very familiar with bear meaning a large mammal (e.g., grizzly bear). However, the word bear as many meanings. When they encounter these other meanings, some writers are attracted to bare because they know that bear denotes the large mammal. Well, unless you mean exposed or naked (i.e., bare), then bear is correct. Dear old ladies and gentlemen who know nothing about being hard up–and may they never, bless their gray old heads–look upon the pawn-shop as the last stage of degradation; but those who know it better (and my readers have no doubt, noticed this themselves) are often surprised, like the little boy who dreamed he went to heaven, at meeting so many people there that they never expected to see. For my part, I think it a much more independent course than borrowing from friends, and I always try to impress this upon those of my acquaintance who incline toward “wanting a couple of pounds till the day after to-morrow.” But they won’t all see it. One of them once remarked that he objected to the principle of the thing. I fancy if he had said it was the interest that he objected to he would have been nearer the truth: twenty-five per cent. certainly does come heavy. Isabelle Oderberg’s Hard to Bear examines pregnancy loss through a lens of investigative journalism upheld by a strong phenomenological framework. Writing with humour, heart and intelligence, the author examines pregnancy loss from practical, cultural, medical and personal perspectives, in accessible and engaging prose. Touching on subjects as varied as defining personhood and the disposal of remains, Oderberg negotiates a gentle path through grief with informed analysis, with an overarching aim towards abolishing taboo.The correct word in this instance is bear: I can’t bear it, or bear with me. But how can you remember that? If you are using the fixed phrase to refer to an excessive burden, always use too much to bear. Too much to bare is usually a mistake based on the homophones bare and bear.

Too much to bear vs. Too much to bare: Remember that bear means to carry or endure as a verb, so substitute too much to endure in your mind when want to use this phrase as a reminder to use bear instead of bare. What does too much to bear mean? Too much to bear is a phrase that means to the point of excess. In this case, the infinitive to bear means to carry or endure.Hard to Bear is a work of witness, advocacy and hope. It originates from Isabelle Oderberg’s experience of being told by an obstetrician, during her sixth miscarriage, that if women were better educated about pregnancy loss, she “wouldn’t be crying about it”. Bleeding and cramping as the doctor waves aside her grief, Oderberg still finds a gift in his dismissal – a fervent and furious flame: “the desire to write this book”. An inch is too much to bare when stripping the insulation from copper wiring; a strong connection usually only requires ¼ inch of exposed wire or less. Some medical language could use an upgrade. Wearing the label “elderly primigravida” doesn’t make anyone envisage a thriving prospect, and I wonder whether a cervix – however wonderful – has sufficient intention to be deemed incompetent. On the other hand, when Oderberg wrote an article titled “The ‘ugly’ side of pregnancy loss is the part we most need to see”, the word “clot” was edited out. Latinate and figurative language obfuscates and tidies up experience, while a blunt noun can reveal it.